When You Have Fought The Good Fight

Despite my early rising and spending time in the Word, there was that one thing that knocked me down. The tears flowed as I spoke to my best friend, my fiancé, my soul mate about the issue. While I was assured that everything will work out for the best and that no matter what, he was right here by my side; there was that something that I couldn't let go. I texted others about the issue of my heart and I sat for a while, then a while longer...and I thought about my calendar on my iPhone and how there were dates that were unmarked for a reason...and I thought about previous conversations with a very dear friend of mine. She asked me a question-a week ago-that was relevant to today in so many ways. Neither one of us knew that God was aligning everything for His good and His glory. Then my heart and soul fell back on an e-mail that I sent a couple of days ago, but to no avail; how it was so related to today. And I thought back on all the days of my adult life and how I struggled for years to care for my kids-with no help-mind you; yet I never gave up and I never pointed the finger at anyone for their unwillingness to provide or for their telling me NO when I asked. Never did I not open my door to those that so graciously turned me down when I was in need and never did I reject any of those that previously wronged me. Did I say never?

Here I am...between praying and drying tears, my heart fell upon 2Timothy 4:7: I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race and I have remained faithful (NLT)...That is some powerful stuff right there. When you have fought the good fight what do you do? Normally we turn our back on our opponent and walk away or in some cases, run. In a boxing match, the champion raising his gloves, pounds his chest, pounce around the ring and hypes the crowd to go wild over him. The fight is over, the last man standing, the champion, the victor. In life's uphill battles do we fight the good fight and celebrate victoriously in the end? Do we stand there and say, "I have finished the race and I have remained faithful"? Or do we turn out back and walk away?

Now, you knew I was going to break it down for you, right? Right. There are four things that must be done to be considered a champion in the end: 1) Fight the good fight 2) Finish the race 3) Remain faithful and 4) Wait on the Lord for direction. What does fighting the good fight mean? I am glad you asked. It means, giving it your all-the best shot: unemployment-fight, stepping out on faith-fight, marriage issues-fight, wayward/disobedient children-fight, broken relationships-continue to fight, workplace issues-fight with all of your might, that new business venture-fighting. Whatever you are challenged with today-FIGHT.

Finish the race. Have you started a project, a goal, a dream and decided that you wanted to stop in the middle? How will you know what could've been or where it could've taken you? Don't give up on yourself; don't sit down on your dreams; don't pass the baton in the meter-dash until you know you have finished the race. God is not done molding you for this thing we call life. He has work for you to do. He has not called you to sit down but to cross the finish line. What has God called you to complete or better yet to begin and to see it thru? A job change? A new house? To feed the poor in the community? To volunteer at a shelter? To leave an abusive relationship? To break the ruins of the past? To clean that extra room for your new office space? Start today-but make sure you finish!

In your finishing the race, did you remain faithful during the course? Did you commit to it and give it your all? Were you steadfast, unmovable in your finishing? AND are you waiting on the Lord for His direction? Trusting in His perfect timing, oops, I meant patience and faith are required during this step. Wait on the Lord, my friend. But in your waiting, know it's not in vain. Wait on your new car, your soul mate, your new house, your new career (notice it's not a job, but a career), your renewed spouse, your college degree, your wayward children to return home, your broken relationships to be mended. Wait!

Know that we are all fighting a fight together-it's called by a different name though.

Is It Really Hard to Say Good-Bye to Yesterday?

As the title of this post pondered in my heart, I had to wonder-is it really hard to say good-bye to yesterday? When we take a look back at all of "things" and "stuff" we've lost or forgotten about; what about the clothes that sit in our closet season after season after season that we only wear once, okay, maybe twice? What about the shoes that we bought for "that" outfit that is amongst the "you wore me one time-my season has passed yet again clothes"? What about those tons of t-shirts that you've been collecting since ET phoned home? BUT, when it comes time to depart with them, we suddenly name them our "favorites" and we continue to hold on to them. So...is it really hard to say good-bye to those clothes?

What about the boyfriend/husband/girlfriend/wife/significant other/life partner that is not so nice to you? He or she has failed to do the things that they started out doing to get you-dinner, movies, concerts, weekend get-aways, date nights, oh how they wooed you-and now, you're two couch potatoes. What about the verbal, mental, emotional, psychological, and sometimes physical abuse? Yet the excuses roll in-the home is taken care of, we're not struggling anymore, he saved me from myself, he/she really do love me, I brought it on myself, he/she is a good guy or girl. What about the broken relationship with a friend or relative that you continue to hold on to, just to save face or the hope that it will one day be like it was back then? Really...is it hard to say good-bye to those relationships?

When I ask the question, I am asking, "What are you holding on to"? It comes a time when we must release what hurts us. Be it physical or emotional, at some point, we must let go. I was thinking how a few years ago my church did the 40 Days of Prayer. It was a church-wide commitment. One of my prayers was revelation in my relationship. I asked God to show me if this is the man he'd intended me to spend the rest of my life with. Well, just like I asked, God showed me-not once but twice. The thing about it, I didn't want to see it. So just like Gideon (in the book of Judges), I went back and said, "Okay Lord, was that you?" Hmmmmm, isn't it funny how we're never ready for what God shows us when we ask? The next night I prayed the same prayer and the next morning, just like I asked, God put it right before my eyes. Now, I needed to know, "Father, how do I make this right before you? Help me in this unhealthy situation". Well, well, well. I went to work and came home to an empty house. I had to laugh at myself because I didn't have the strength to cry. I asked God to please help me. I was nearly begging. In the middle of my sleep, I was awakened by this statement: "Get up! You've been here before! What did you do then!" In other words, you've struggled before, you've been abandoned before (maybe not in this literal sense), you've been without and how did you do it then? Girl stop the nonsense. To answer my own question, "It is not hard to say good-bye to yesterday"!

What is your yesterday that you need to say good-bye to? What hurt is holding you hostage? What's in your closet that you need to sit out with the Salvation Army "stuff"? How many shoes are you no longer wearing-yet you're holding on, why? Yesterday should-in no way-keep you in bondage. Yesterday's mistakes. Yesterday's lies. Yesterday's unforgiveness. Yesterday's deceitfulness. Yesterday's sinful nature. Yesterday's malice. Yesterday's promiscuity. Yesterday's bad girl. Yesterday's bad boy. Yesterday is never to be seen again. So I challenge you, my friend, to find a way to clean out the closet of yesterday and get rid of the shoes you no longer wish to walk in. We live in our yesterdays never letting them go (just like those umpteen t-shirts we never wear) and yesterday becomes our today and it rolls over into our tomorrow. We walk with it, talk with it, sleep with it, eat with it, drive to work with it. It has consumed us and we are no longer living in today and for tomorrow, but existing in yesterday. The sad reality is that we've failed to recognize yesterday because it's hidden beneath those shirts that we wear today or it's tucked away behind that pretty little dress we're wearing to our friend's birthday party. It may even be under the bed with those shoes that you would "just die" if you didn't get them right then-at that very moment.

What do you need to Arise! and go and handle? It's never too late and it not too hard to say good bye to yesterday.

Who Do We Say We Are?

It's been a rainy Saturday & I haven't as much as darted the door for anything. I think the closest I came to outside is letting the garage door up ONLY so I could get my Bible out of the back of my SUV. Now this particular Bible is the one that's falling apart & has come apart at the binding, it cant be taken out of the cover that reads, "Too Blessed to be Stressed" I so want to put my new Bible in this cover but I NEED to keep my old Bible in it. I don't think anyone quite understands why I hold onto this Bible when I waited patiently for this NLT/Message Parallel Bible to go on sale.

 

Well, you see,  this old Bible has carried me thru some pretty tough/rough times. Times of lies, destruction, anger, bitterness, abandonment,  loneliness; times when I was on a self-destructive behavioral pattern; times when I couldn't pay rent or utilities, didn't have a car, was unhappy with my job; times of brokeness! Times when friends were few! You see, this Bible held me together-even though it's falling apart! A friend of mine found the cover at a local thrift store & told me, your Bible is an embarrassment to every Bible in the Dollar Tree! One dollar can get you a new Bible. She was absolutely right, but it couldn't get me THIS Bible! After all I'd been thru and was on an uphill journey, she'd found the perfect cover for the perfect Bible that defined who I am perfectly, "Too blessed to be stressed"! Amen & Amen again! I can't think of one reason to stress over anything anymore.

 

I call myself blessed! Or sometimes I refer to me as humble; other times you may here me address myself as victorious! When I put my shouting shoes on, I'm also known as prosperous. There were times in the past when I'd hear others call me a sinner. So as I reflect back over my life's story - one song comes to mind - A Sinner's Prayer! And one movie scene comes to mind - from The Color Purple - "See daddy sinners have souls too! I am who I say I am, "Daughter of the King above all Kings!"

 

People approach me all the time - family members, especially - wanting to say they remember when! I'm glad my final fate wont be determined by man. I released the past a long time ago & promised myself to live without regret! Without the disappointments of life; without carrying life's baggage around with me! Instead, I choose to speak "life" into all situations. I choose to ignore the calling of the past. I choose to be who I say I am!!!!

 

Who do you say you are & why?

Diary of a Book Nerd: The Rain and Harvest

As I walked through my home praying for my family and thanking God for keeping us as we slept and slumbered, I was in my own little world, no thoughts of my ever-growing to do list or what's for dinner or what am I going to wear-it was just me and the Lord! THEN, it occurred to me that it was raining-a pounding rain. I was so engulfed in the moment with God that I didn't take the time to realize that the sun was not out and the birds were not chirping. The minute I realized that the rain was pouring, I opened the bedroom and dining room windows. I listened as I felt the cool breeze & I thanked God for the rain as I know He sends the rain to multiply the harvest.

I immediately envisioned the garden that the camp students at my church were "tending" to this Summer. The Director over the Summer Camp and members of our partner church, tilled the ground and planted a garden in early May. By the time the camp began in early June, the garden needed tending to; someone would have to pick the green beans, tomatoes, squash and cucumbers. And the perfect candidates are....Well it rained a couple of weekends ago & on the following Monday, the Harvest was ready for the picking. There was an abundance of cucumbers, squash, cherry tomatoes and green tomatoes. Boy, oh boy did the kids have a good time picking the veggies. The awe in their eyes was truly a site for mothers everywhere to see. It was their very own sense of accomplishment. Each individual student had a certain excitement about "the garden" and the veggies they'd picked.  

Then the thought became personal as I envisioned my own dreams and goals and what God is doing to, thru, and for me. Tears welled up in my eyes as I thought back to the Beth Moore study, Breaking Free and the chains of bondage, and then I went back to Priscilla Shirer's study, Discerning the Voice of God and the quiet still voice. And I came a little more recent-as recent as Tuesday when one of my online Bible Study friends confirmed what God has been saying to me-in that quiet still voice & the bondage I am holding myself in by not obeying the quiet still voice. Well if that wasn't enough, the same day, different group-online book club-another woman confirmed the same thing that was confirmed earlier in the day. Talk about a shouting in my spirit & the flow of more tears.

In my life, in this season, the storms have passed and the rain has ceased. I am by no means saying that there won't be anymore storms or the rain won't ever come again. I am simply stating that I am in the midst of a Harvest-the Harvest of God's Blessings. The Harvest of Answered Prayers. Now, these prayers may be prayers from the valley experience in my life, but nonetheless, they are answered prayers. The Harvest of Obedience to God's Word, Will and Way. The Harvest of God's Calling to Greater. I am presently working full time in the ministry-which has been an experience that only God will allow me to partake in and then call me to something bigger, better, yes! Greater! For years, I have said, "This job is only temporary, I am simply passing thru, my next job is going to be my own business. I've spent my entire adult life making companies rich while I am the one looked over and left out." A couple of years ago, I began working on my business-however, I didn't have a support system-and then I (yes, there's an 'and then') went thru the valley-Wait, I made the valley my home. I heard it, plain as day,  "This is not where I have led you and this not where you will remain". Complacency and Surrender! Complacency in the situation & admitting the fact caused me to surrender. Asking God to show me, order my steps, guard my tongue, humble my heart and open my eyes. AND (no, there's no 'and then') He did. But I had to go thru the valley experience (not live in like I did-but go thru), to be able to hear Him in the Calling to Greater and to be able to put one step in front of the other and follow in Obedience.

He brought me to a business, my business, Kelly L. Virtual Office Solutions. He has equipped me with the skills, talents, and ability; He has provided me with a location; He has heard my cry, moan, and pout about my current situation-now it is up to me to make it happen. The Harvest of God's Calling to Greater-it all started right here. In order to reap the benefits of this Harvest, I must heed to the Harvest of Obedience to God's Word, Will, and Way. The confirmations on Tuesday were no coincidence-they were God speaking thru the women to me! Just like the children at the Summer Camp, my face was flushed with awe as I read the confirmations and as they resonated in my soul. Then my make up, eyeshadow, mascara, and eyeliner became one big mural on the canvas of my face as the tears flooded and the sobs turned to praise.

In your life there is a Harvest of Answered Prayers, what have you sought God for in your valley experience and realized later that He answered? If you are out of your valley experience, that alone is an answered prayer. There is also the Harvest of Obedience to God's Word, Will and Way. Are you willing to walk in in His obedience? Are you ready to reap the benefits of His obedience? And of course, the Harvest of God's Calling to Greater. Do you know what your calling to greater is? The job you're not pleased with? The house you've outgrown? The city with no job opportunities? To return to school?

Are you ready for the Harvest?

Women & Fruits of the Spirit: Love (Final)

Hello Friends and Family!

Well, I guess I broke my promise to update on a weekly basis. Life happens, the holidays happen and life happens again.  Anywho, pray for me & please forgive me.

So, let's wrap up this "love thing" we've been on for two months-or it is three? Who's counting?

Love is not: self-seeking, easily angered; it keeps no record of wrongdoing, it does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth, always protects, always trust, and always perseveres. Can we handle this? It does not matter if we can handle it, God has given it to us to abide by whether we want to or not. I know many of us (including me) are used to having our way, making decisions on our own, not answering to anyone when it comes to what we want and how we want it. The truth of the matter is, we many not answer to man, but we do have to give an account for our actions.

• Love is not self-seeking. Before you can say you are not self seeking, let's take a look at the definition of self-seeking. Dictionary.com defines self-seeking as the seeking of one's own interest or selfish ends; selfish. Is this you? Are you selfish? As an only girl, only granddaughter, only niece..you get the picture I had the tendency to be very selfish. It was known that if the boys came to play with my brother or cousins they were in for one of Kelly's treats: to be bossed around-pretty much bullied. When it came to sharing and caring, that was not me. I would run and tell my aunt and grandmother & the boys were made to leave me alone. This was surely not an act of love. There is a reason God tells us that love is not self-seeking. It can lead to self-destruction. By not being self-seeking people, we will put others needs before ours without question, we will live by, "It is better to give than to receive". There is a higher level of generosity during the Thanksgiving/Christmas season. People are giving more: adopting angels from the Salvation Army Angel Tree, donating unwrapped toys to the local agencies, providing meals for the homeless. But when the holidays are over, the Salvation Army bellringers are packed up and gone home, the Christmas decoration is taken down, and we return to our normal routine, do we forget to give? Do we forget there is still a need? Are we only giving because it seems "right" to do at this time of year? Generosity is a part of that  not being self-seeking. I must say, that little selfish 9 year old still lives within me. I have to remind myself constantly that I have what I have and I am who I am because of God's goodness and mercy. What if God decided He was not sprinkling anymore of His mercy on us, what if He kept His blessings and did nothing for us? What would we have? Where would we be? 
• Love is not easily angered. There is much to be said about being easily angered. There is always that one person that seems to push your button, that seems to get on your last nerve, that just seems to get under your skin. There's the child's father, the child's mother, the ex-husband/wife, the disobedient child, the co-worker, or the family member. Your reaction to these people is always hostility or anger. Don't you know that he who angers you, controls you. These people know just what to do to get your blood boiling and you walk right into their trap. While we know they are not acting out of love, can we say our reaction is out of love? We've all heard the saying, "Kill them with kindness." Let's spread a little of kindness and not be easily angered. Let's stop being the victim. Instead, let's lift these people up in prayer & leave it there. My Pastor once told me, "Don't let people take up space in your head". In other words, don't give them the time of day and don't spend your valuable time giving thought to their actions and/or their issues. When we retaliate, we are cutting our own blessings short. What do we accomplish when we respond with anger? We've allowed the other person to achieve their goal of getting next to you. 
• Love keeps no record of wrongdoing. That statement carries POWER! How many of us have found ourselves in an argument-wait, we don't argue-in a deep discussion with our spouse, soul mate, significant other, etc. and the first thing out of our mouth is "You did this, that, the other, and the other, that and this"? You don't have to raise your hand, I'm raising mine. Yes, ladies, we are keeping record of wrongdoing. I had to laugh to myself when I read that statement and really meditate on it. I was convicted deep down in my spirit because I was the number one record keeper. I used to wait til the "discussion" reached a heightened level of frustration and then blurt out all the wrong that was done. AND the killing part about it was that I thought my slate was clean and I was the innocent victim in the relationship. The truth of the matter is I was just as wrong-if not wronger (is that a word)-as my significant other because I was sitting here keeping track of everything wrong that he was done. Whether it is to a mate, a friend, an enemy, a child, etc. it is not of God and it definitely is not out of love. In my opinion this is just a bad as pointing the finger. While you're pointing on finger at someone else, there are four more pointing back at you. I clearly heard Him speak to me and tell me, "You are not acting out of love". I didn't know that God was telling me at that particular time, but as I approached today's blog, it came to me. We've all done wrong and it is NOT a good feeling to be called out about your wrongs. Now that we know better, let's all try to do better-No more record keeping of wrongdoing.
• Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. Enough said!
• Love always protects. This stuck with me. My significant other told me that it is his job as the man in my life to protect me. As I read this, I went back to the conversation he and I had about protecting me. He protects me because he love me. The same is true for our Lord and Savior. He protects us out of love as we should our children and others in our life that we love. We shelter our children from the evil of society by moving from the inner city or urban neighborhoods so that they can attend a better school with better this and better that. I am not calling anyone out because I am this person also. I tell my kids constantly, "I can pack up and move back to Ensley and live for $800 month, send you to an urban, inner city high school, but I choose to live in Grayson Valley and send you to a better high school with unlimited opportunities. Not saying that the inner city high schools do not have opportunities, BUT because I love you, didn't you to grow up the way I did, I choose to"protect" you". We should not want to see the people we love harmed, injured or ill. God's love for us is incredible, it protects. He protects us from the storm raging all around us. He protects us from our enemies. He protects us from the murderer, the rapist, the child abuser, the pedophile, the identity thief, the home burglar, the car thief; in many ways He has protected us from a down-turned economy-we are employed; have shelter, food, clothing, and the basic necessities of life-God's love and protection. Our love should protect others as God's love protects us.
• Love always trust. Sometimes we find it difficult to trust others, especially in new relationships. We will hold the other person hostage to the wrongs the last person did to us. This is not fair to the new person and neither is it fair to you. Once a relationship moves to a seriousness that involves love-there should not be any trust issues. You can't love someone and not trust them as the word simply says, Love always trust. Love doesn't trust when it's convenient for you to want to trust. Love doesn't trust when you say so. Love always trust. Always as in all the time-day and night, every second of every minute or every hour of every day of every week of every month of every year-for a lifetime-ALWAYS. Bottom line is, you can't love someone and not trust them.
• Love always perseveres. When the world persevere is mentioned, struggle & strength comes to me. I think about how we go through so many struggles and strife in life and many times ask the one famous question, "Is it all worth it?" The answer never changes, "Yes!" When we are at our lowest is when we call upon the Lord to give us the strength to persevere. Why? Out of love. We persevere for our children, husbands, wives, and others that we love. In other words, love does not give up, it keeps going and going, like the energizer bunny. It doesn't stop because the road took a turn to the side called rough. It doesn't give up because times have gotten hard. It doesn't run away because of a simple argument. Love perseveres-it doesn't get tired, it doesn't take a break, it doesn't have sick and vacation days; it doesn't have an on/off switch. Love always perseveres.

Love-one of the fruits of the spirit that carries a lot of weight!

Women & Fruits of the Spirit: Love (Part III)

Wow! It's been three weeks since I last posted. I want to take this time to beg your forgiveness! I am back and promise to post at least on a weekly basis! Don't think I've been neglecting you, that more certainly is not the case. Now! Back to business...

Love does not dishonor others. This is a statement that carries weight! What exactly is dishonor? I am glad you asked. According to Dictionary.com, dishonor is to treat with disrespect. There are people among us that will claim to be lovers, doers, and hearers of the WORD, but will walk right in front of someone entering a building and allow the door to close/slam in their face. Clearly this is not a display of love and is flat out disrespect for the other person. A good friend on mine posted on Facebook a few days ago that as she and her kids were shopping in Wal-Mart, another person walked up and pushed her son out of the way instead of saying, "Excuse me", "Pardon me", or "Can I get by please?" To put your hands on someone-or their kids for that matter-is a clear sign of disrespect. Every person breathing the breath of life deserves to be treated with respect, no matter the situation.

• Respect in families-My granny used to say, "Respect your elders" there was never any dialogue about why, you just knew to respect your elders so your days on Earth wouldn't be cut short. Children are taught to respect their parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins and siblings-they're also taught to respect their teachers and anyone else in authority. Why? Because! 
• Respect in relationships/marriages-Love shouldn't allow you to disrespect your mate. Respect is the right thing to do-plus karma is not nice & does not play fair. If you are not happy in your relationship, seek options to make it better-if it doesn't work, then maybe it's time to reevaluate the situation and do what is best for the both of you; instead of holding on, disrespecting each other and the relationship. Nothing good ever comes out of a disrespectful, lack of love relationship.
• Respect for people. How hard is it to follow the golden rule, treat others the way you want to be treated. It is a matter of respect. I am sure that none of us want to be talked down upon, talked about, mistreated, put out, kicked while they're down or trampled on-so, why would we do it to others. I've heard on many occasions that chivalry is dead. I have a question. Is it? Wait, I have another question. Can it be revived? Out of matter of respect?

Love does not dishonor others-meaning it follows the golden rule! Respect/honor is love.

Women & Fruits of the Spirit: Love (Part II)

Picking up where we left off…Love (fruit of the spirit) does not envy. Dictionary.com defines envy as jealousy; longing to possess something awarded to or achieved by another; a feeling of resentment that another has gained something that one more rightfully deserves. How many of you are killing yourself laughing at these definitions? I found these definitions quite hilarious not only as I was reading them, but also as I began to type them. I thought to myself, “Why would I want what someone else rightfully earned? Why would I want something that is achieved by and awarded to someone else?” I wouldn’t and I don’t. Believe it or not, there are people out there that spend their days and nights longing for what others have and it does not matter what it takes to get, they will get it.

Love does not envy- How many of us grew up in the home where you better not come in the house and tell your parents that Johnny and Jessica had the latest pair shoes and their parents just bought a new car? Raising my hand high above everyone else’s because the first words out of my parents mouths were, “You don’t know how Johnny and Jessica’s parents are paying for what they have” Why did we feel it necessary to tell our parents about Jessica and Johnny’s situation? Because at that particular time, we wanted a new pair of shoes just like theirs or maybe we were ashamed of that big green car that your parents so nicknamed Nelly that would break down every other block. We were envious of their material possessions.

Now that we are older, we know that envy is not of God and envy does not fit in the love equation because love does not envy and it does not buy a new car because your neighbor bought a new car, it does not remodel its kitchen because the best friend remodeled her bathroom, it does not put itself in debt trying to keep up with the Jones’. By the way, who are the Jones’? We don’t know how Mr. and Mrs. Jones are paying for what they have. What God has for you is for you & no one can take it away. Meaning you have what God sees fit for you to have at this particular time in your life. He will not give us more than He thinks we are ready for. You may be at a point in your life where this is what you’re meant to have. Not to say that this is all you’re meant to have in life.

Love does not boast and it is not proud. To me, to be boastful goes hand in hand with being proud. These are the people we tend to call show-offs and these are the people we tend to not want to be around because they work our first and last nerves. These people are similar to the women on these Real Housewives shows. There’s always one woman on the show that the others do not like because she’s boastful and proud a/k/a a show-off. Our parents & grandparents spent countless ours telling us to be ourselves and not pretend to be something or someone we are not. Why? Oh why did they tell us this? Because they didn’t want us to grow up and try to be someone or something that we are not, to start boasting and bragging about what we have, when we really don’t have anything, to begin to show-off our earthly possessions as if we can take it with us when we leave here. Boastful and proud, show-off’s, fake, phony, or whatever you want to call it, is not of God and does not fulfill the greatest command or is aligned with the first fruit of the spirit, Love.

Let’s reevaluate areas in our lives and see if we walking in love or if we are harboring envy, boastfulness, and pride. Are we one of those Real Housewives that no one wants to be around? 

To be envious, boastful and proud is not of love and goes against God’s greatest command-to love and love is the first fruit of the spirit.