Well, I guess I broke my promise to update on a weekly basis. Life happens, the holidays happen and life happens again. Anywho, pray for me & please forgive me.
So, let's wrap up this "love thing" we've been on for two months-or it is three? Who's counting?
Love is not: self-seeking, easily angered; it keeps no record of wrongdoing, it does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth, always protects, always trust, and always perseveres. Can we handle this? It does not matter if we can handle it, God has given it to us to abide by whether we want to or not. I know many of us (including me) are used to having our way, making decisions on our own, not answering to anyone when it comes to what we want and how we want it. The truth of the matter is, we many not answer to man, but we do have to give an account for our actions.
- Love is not self-seeking. Before you can say you are not self seeking, let's take a look at the definition of self-seeking. Dictionary.com defines self-seeking as the seeking of one's own interest or selfish ends; selfish. Is this you? Are you selfish? As an only girl, only granddaughter, only niece..you get the picture I had the tendency to be very selfish. It was known that if the boys came to play with my brother or cousins they were in for one of Kelly's treats: to be bossed around-pretty much bullied. When it came to sharing and caring, that was not me. I would run and tell my aunt and grandmother & the boys were made to leave me alone. This was surely not an act of love. There is a reason God tells us that love is not self-seeking. It can lead to self-destruction. By not being self-seeking people, we will put others needs before ours without question, we will live by, "It is better to give than to receive". There is a higher level of generosity during the Thanksgiving/Christmas season. People are giving more: adopting angels from the Salvation Army Angel Tree, donating unwrapped toys to the local agencies, providing meals for the homeless. But when the holidays are over, the Salvation Army bellringers are packed up and gone home, the Christmas decoration is taken down, and we return to our normal routine, do we forget to give? Do we forget there is still a need? Are we only giving because it seems "right" to do at this time of year? Generosity is a part of that not being self-seeking. I must say, that little selfish 9 year old still lives within me. I have to remind myself constantly that I have what I have and I am who I am because of God's goodness and mercy. What if God decided He was not sprinkling anymore of His mercy on us, what if He kept His blessings and did nothing for us? What would we have? Where would we be?
- Love is not easily angered. There is much to be said about being easily angered. There is always that one person that seems to push your button, that seems to get on your last nerve, that just seems to get under your skin. There's the child's father, the child's mother, the ex-husband/wife, the disobedient child, the co-worker, or the family member. Your reaction to these people is always hostility or anger. Don't you know that he who angers you, controls you. These people know just what to do to get your blood boiling and you walk right into their trap. While we know they are not acting out of love, can we say our reaction is out of love? We've all heard the saying, "Kill them with kindness." Let's spread a little of kindness and not be easily angered. Let's stop being the victim. Instead, let's lift these people up in prayer & leave it there. My Pastor once told me, "Don't let people take up space in your head". In other words, don't give them the time of day and don't spend your valuable time giving thought to their actions and/or their issues. When we retaliate, we are cutting our own blessings short. What do we accomplish when we respond with anger? We've allowed the other person to achieve their goal of getting next to you.
- Love keeps no record of wrongdoing. That statement carries POWER! How many of us have found ourselves in an argument-wait, we don't argue-in a deep discussion with our spouse, soul mate, significant other, etc. and the first thing out of our mouth is "You did this, that, the other, and the other, that and this"? You don't have to raise your hand, I'm raising mine. Yes, ladies, we are keeping record of wrongdoing. I had to laugh to myself when I read that statement and really meditate on it. I was convicted deep down in my spirit because I was the number one record keeper. I used to wait til the "discussion" reached a heightened level of frustration and then blurt out all the wrong that was done. AND the killing part about it was that I thought my slate was clean and I was the innocent victim in the relationship. The truth of the matter is I was just as wrong-if not wronger (is that a word)-as my significant other because I was sitting here keeping track of everything wrong that he was done. Whether it is to a mate, a friend, an enemy, a child, etc. it is not of God and it definitely is not out of love. In my opinion this is just a bad as pointing the finger. While you're pointing on finger at someone else, there are four more pointing back at you. I clearly heard Him speak to me and tell me, "You are not acting out of love". I didn't know that God was telling me at that particular time, but as I approached today's blog, it came to me. We've all done wrong and it is NOT a good feeling to be called out about your wrongs. Now that we know better, let's all try to do better-No more record keeping of wrongdoing.
- Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. Enough said!
- Love always protects. This stuck with me. My significant other told me that it is his job as the man in my life to protect me. As I read this, I went back to the conversation he and I had about protecting me. He protects me because he love me. The same is true for our Lord and Savior. He protects us out of love as we should our children and others in our life that we love. We shelter our children from the evil of society by moving from the inner city or urban neighborhoods so that they can attend a better school with better this and better that. I am not calling anyone out because I am this person also. I tell my kids constantly, "I can pack up and move back to Ensley and live for $800 month, send you to an urban, inner city high school, but I choose to live in Grayson Valley and send you to a better high school with unlimited opportunities. Not saying that the inner city high schools do not have opportunities, BUT because I love you, didn't you to grow up the way I did, I choose to"protect" you". We should not want to see the people we love harmed, injured or ill. God's love for us is incredible, it protects. He protects us from the storm raging all around us. He protects us from our enemies. He protects us from the murderer, the rapist, the child abuser, the pedophile, the identity thief, the home burglar, the car thief; in many ways He has protected us from a down-turned economy-we are employed; have shelter, food, clothing, and the basic necessities of life-God's love and protection. Our love should protect others as God's love protects us.
- Love always trust. Sometimes we find it difficult to trust others, especially in new relationships. We will hold the other person hostage to the wrongs the last person did to us. This is not fair to the new person and neither is it fair to you. Once a relationship moves to a seriousness that involves love-there should not be any trust issues. You can't love someone and not trust them as the word simply says, Love always trust. Love doesn't trust when it's convenient for you to want to trust. Love doesn't trust when you say so. Love always trust. Always as in all the time-day and night, every second of every minute or every hour of every day of every week of every month of every year-for a lifetime-ALWAYS. Bottom line is, you can't love someone and not trust them.
- Love always perseveres. When the world persevere is mentioned, struggle & strength comes to me. I think about how we go through so many struggles and strife in life and many times ask the one famous question, "Is it all worth it?" The answer never changes, "Yes!" When we are at our lowest is when we call upon the Lord to give us the strength to persevere. Why? Out of love. We persevere for our children, husbands, wives, and others that we love. In other words, love does not give up, it keeps going and going, like the energizer bunny. It doesn't stop because the road took a turn to the side called rough. It doesn't give up because times have gotten hard. It doesn't run away because of a simple argument. Love perseveres-it doesn't get tired, it doesn't take a break, it doesn't have sick and vacation days; it doesn't have an on/off switch. Love always perseveres.
